How to Handle the Co-worker Who Just Doesnt Get It

How to Handle the Co-worker Who Just Doesnt Get ItHow to Handle the Co-worker Who Just Doesnt Get ItWeve all had to work with that person The clueless colleague who keeps putting her foot in her mouth because she cant read the tension in the conference room. Or that strange boss who latches onto an idea as the next best thing when everyone else agrees its a walking disaster.If your day at work regularly plays out like a scene from The Office, youre leid alone. A whopping 94% of managers surveyed by the authors of Toxic Workplace Managing Toxic Personalities and Their Systems of Power said that they worked with a toxic person. And the behaviors that drove them crazy werent necessarily as obvious as bullying or harassment acts like passive hostility or team sabotage were among the causes for stress.Its possible that the executive who constantly gives you backhanded compliments isnt just being Ms. Insensitivity. She may lack emotional intelligence, or EQ, defined as the ability to read the social signals around you and react appropriately. Those with a high EQ have greater self awareness, better control over their emotions, and the ability to motivate themselves, as well as show greater empathy toward others, which is useful in areas like conflict resolution and team building.Remember, however, that a high EQ doesnt necessarily mean you are virtuous (as Fast Companys Drake Baer points out, both Martin Luther King, Jr. and Adolf Hitler had high EQs)- its more about whether you can read your environment and react accordingly. Still, those with high EQs are more likely to be successful in their jobs. And those with low EQs can make others feel like they are talking to a brick wall.So how can you get across to your emotionally unintelligent bosses and co-workers who cant seem to get a clue? Follow unterstellung tips to improve communications.Dont Condemn ThemMost people want to vilify low-EQ co-workers, but dont fault them for skills they dont have. Emotions are infor mation, organizational psychologist Sigal Barsade tells Fast Company. In essence, people who are low in emotional intelligence are lacking the ability to take in, understand, or process a really critical part of the way that we communicate in the world. If they cant read your emotions, they wont be getting all the info youre naturally sending them.Be as Clear as PossibleThis means saying what you mean, without the frills. In other words, dont use sarcasm the co-workers youre trying to reach arent going to pick up on that. And always tell the whole story Barsade explains that emotionally unintelligent people need to know what data or information they are missing.Give Constructive CriticismAs awkward as it may be, people with low EQs need feedback, and even in real-time, if possible. And you should always give it with a calm demeanor, because they are more likely to mirror that behavior back. If you need to schedule a time with your manager for a more sensitive conversation, read auth or and consultant Judith Glasers seven tips for how to prepare for the talk on Fast Company.Now about that co-worker who wont stop clipping his nails in the broMore from LearnVest10 Secrets You Need to Know About Your Boss6 Signs You May Be an Insensitive Boss8 Get-Ahead Questions to Ask Your BossThis article is from our friends at LearnVest, a leading site for personal finance.